Author: admin

 

We all go out to eat. We sit down and order an appetizer and a main course. The problem is we get full on the appetizer, and then can’t handle the meal. Life can be like that. We stop short of God’s complete blessing, and get complacent with the here and now. We get comfortable with the way things are. When asked “How are things going?” we respond with statements like, “Same old same old”, or “another day another dollar.” We need to learn how to indulge in the full course of life. Don’t stop at the appetizer. You can eat some of it and save the rest for later. The main course is the essence of the meal. The appetizer is a small dish of food or drink taken before a meal or the main course of a meal to stimulate one’s appetite.

We are a visual people, however certain things will only be revealed after you have given up something else. Unfortunately we want to keep everything we have and add more to it. God does not work like that. Sometimes He has to strip you of everything in order to get you to the right thing. But we keep holding on and eating what was first presented to us. We look over at the entrée and think, “I can save that for later.”  But once you take the food off that pretty plate in the restaurant, you can never recreate the ambience of the first presentation. So don’t allow God’s blessings to get cold and be reheated because you were greedy during the initial phase of the meal. Don’t get full on the appetizer! God’s main course is so much better.

 

There will always be doors opening and closing in your life. It is your job to decide how much emphasis you will place on the closed door versus the new one that is opening. If you continue to look back and wish that things were different or second guess yourself on why things happened the way they did, please know that the new door cannot swing open as wide. When you look for someone or something to place the blame, the universe cannot give you what you really need. It is not good to take the negative energy of what didn’t work out into the new door that is about to open. This is the hardest principle to follow in life, but it is a necessary one. As I watch a door come to a close I am so tempted to ask questions, because as women we want closure. We want someone to tell us what went wrong so we don’t make the same mistake again. You didn’t make a mistake. Life is opening you to a new possibility by way of someone else not accepting who you are. Even if you had done things differently, you would still be preparing to step through another door. So don’t beat yourself up! Of course it’s hard to remain calm when it always seems that you are the problem. Sometimes you ask God, why can’t another door open because of something someone else did? Why does it always seem to be about what I did or did not do? You get comfortable in places and show your real self and the relationship changes. Don’t get mad with the other person. Be thankful that God sees the future and your move may be His way of avoiding a disaster, because there is something more in line with your character. It will be hard to see this while you are trying to leave a crack in the door. You are hoping that something can be done to change the circumstances so you can go back. God is moving you forward, so stop looking back. Focus all your attention and positive energy on the new door that is looking you in the face.

If we really took the time to look around we would see how blessed we really are. Some of what we trash or get tired of would be a treasure to someone who has never had it. Society teaches us that the next big thing is always just around the corner. So we keep looking for it at the expense of enjoying life right now. Even the small things can make a different in your perspective on life. I live alone but I have enough dishes to feed a family of six. Why? Because they look good in my cabinet, and it would be nice to have a complete set of something in case company comes. Well, guess what? I’m changing that. Good, sturdy, paper plates will have to do from now on. Plus, they make beautiful plates that look much better than my dishes. I’m simply trying to make a point!

We are always begging God for something. When’s the last time you sat down and said, “Lord I don’t want anything. I just want to thank you for everything that I have right now. My needs are met and my wants are few. If you don’t do another thing, then I’m okay with that.” How often do we have that conversation with God? Not often enough. I am guilty as charged, however, today I am thanking God for all the things that I asked for and did not receive. I always know that His timing and will is better, but I still beg. What I know for sure is, when you are grateful for what you have, you can hear God’s voice when it’s time to make that call, or check something out on the website, or step outside your comfort zone. In those moments, you and only you will know that the time is right. So, as you continue to beg, which we all do, be careful what you ask for. Because you just might get it if you beg long enough. Everything you want is not necessarily good for you. And sometimes once you get it, you have to make that call back to God and have Him step in and change the circumstances. His reply will always be, “I gave you what you asked for, but because I love you I will handle the situation.” I know I have had that conversation with Him many times. Sometimes the best step you can take is a step back. Stop looking for the next big thing.

When you think about the next level what comes to mind? Is it career, home, job, or relationship? For so many of us, the next level is scary no matter what area of our lives we consider. Why is that? The number one reason that we hesitate to move to the next level in anything, is because we fear the unknown. Going to the next level will require more of us. We will have to change the way we do things. It may even require that we leave some people and situations behind. The next level will also require us to give more of our time, talents, and gifts. Because to whom much is given, much is required. Then there’s the problem with maintaining the next level once you get there. We have our current level down to a science. Matter of fact, we can do what we do in our sleep, and some of us do.

The second reason the next level can be scary, is the fact that we are comfortable with the known. We know the enemy in our house. We just don’t know what might be outside. Therefore, we remain in situations that have died long ago. Either we are tired of those around us, or we are tired of seeing ourselves in the same spot day in and day out. Doesn’t necessarily mean that something is wrong with where we are, but there is this voice inside our head that keeps telling us, that more is possible and deserved. On the one hand we tell ourselves that we should be content with where we are, because there are people who have less than us. So why are we complaining? It’s not that we are complaining, but we don’t want to get complacent either. It is so easy to say this is good enough. If everybody said that, then there would be no millionaires.

There have been times when someone offered to bless me, and I would say you don’t have to do that.  Their immediate reply would be, “I know I don’t have to, but I want to.  So don’t block MY blessing.”  It wasn’t until recently that I have come to realize the blessing in being a blessing.  I have always loved to give and do for others but often times found I was unable to do so.  The reason was, because I was looking at what was in my hands.

During my morning readings I was directed to Ecclesiastes, chapter 12, where the following stood out for me:  “You will limp along like a grasshopper when you walk.  Your appetite will be gone. Then you will go to your everlasting home, and people will go to your funeral.”  My first thought was, no appetite?  I’m just being honest because I love to eat.  Once I got pass that thought, my mind went to the importance of being prepared for emergencies, versus holding your hand so tight that nothing comes in and nothing goes out.  There is no better feeling than being able to help someone, especially when you think about the people who have helped you along the way.  No matter how hard you try you will never be prepared for every emergency that comes your way.  Although the rich may be able to pay for whatever pops up, no one will be able to take anything with them when it’s all said and done.  So keep in mind what Suze Orman says, “People first, then money, then things.”  If I never get another “thing” I will be fine, but there are a few people who make it all worthwhile.

 

 

 

We all know that the heart is the main organ in the body, so naturally when something compromises the heart the whole body is affected.  Most of us probably don’t even realize how many of our actions are based on where our heart stands.  We say things like, “If your heart’s not in it then don’t do it”, “The heart wants what it wants”, and, “I’ve had a change of heart.”  All of those statements determine how you respond to any given situation.

This week I had someone ask me for a hug.  As much as I love giving hugs,  I was a llittle hesitant because my heart was not on it.  Rather than give them a pretentious hug, I decided to address the issue of where my heart is.  After hearing what I had to say, the both of us decided to give each other another chance, and a heartfelt hug was shared. Sometimes all it takes is a moment of honesty and a change of heart to change your circumstances.  As humbling as that may be, the reward can be priceless.  The conversation and hug I shared today changed my future.

 

 

Give me a seed and I will make it grow.  No, I’m not talking about planting a seed in a flower pot or the ground.  I’m talking about a seed of hope, a seed of love, or a seed of joy.  We have all been given seeds from God.  What we choose to do with them is up to us.  But don’t eat your seed!  Life should not always be about me, me, and me.  When God blesses you He can always make it go further than you could ever dream.  It may seem like you barely have enough for yourself, but I have come to realize that the minute I give to someone else, I watch more come back to me.

A seed does not come alive until it dies.  We need to be dead to some of our ways, dead to our thinking at times and even dead to others.  Yes!  If you know for a fact that someone means you no good, don’t answer the call or text.  They will eventually stop calling.  I read somewhere the other day that if you are not losing friends, then you are not growing.  That’s interesting.  I have a new appreciation for the friends that I have lost.

Then there are seeds that we see in others.  We have to be careful how we allow those seeds to be sewn into our lives.  Don’t plant someone else’s opinion of you in your mind.  Don’t operate in your gifts based on the belief system of another.  Why would you make a major decision that you will have to live with the rest of your life, based on what someone else thinks?  That just doesn’t make sense.  Of course, we have to consider others if we are married or in relationships.  I’m not suggesting that you do whatever you want to do regardless of your partners’ ideas. But be careful that you do not lose sight of you in striving to please another.  We all have important seeds to sow and grow.

 

 

 

WARNING:  This blog is morbid and totally out of character for me.  For those of you who read the first paragraph and decide whether to continue, I’m starting right where my thoughts begin.  As I was flipping the channels I came across one of the “Housewives” shows and decided to linger awhile.  A couple was talking with a counselor about saving their marriage, and I found it to be quite interesting.  During the session the counselor asked each spouse to write their own eulogy and have the other person read it.  Not only did they have to read it, but the opposite spouse had to lie on the floor as though they were dead while the other one read their eulogy.  There was even a fake headstone with the writing, “Here lies  …”   Although I would never consider writing my own eulogy, I have given serious thought to writing the program for my home going service.  And this week I thought about it more than I have in the past.

As I watched a video that was posted on Facebook this week about detoxing your body, I was moved by the additional statements about toxic relationships and prioritizing the people in your life.  Then there was the horrible massacre at the church in Charleston, SC, where I live, and three days later I just happened to flip to this program where a husband and wife pretended to be dead, while the other read their eulogy.  The combination of these events in one week just took me to a place of heaviness that I didn’t know I had until I walked into my church service on Sunday morning.  I’m beginning to take a serious evaluation of what really matters in the end.

 

I remember being poor and wondered what people meant when they said, “You pay for atmosphere.”  My thought was you pay for food, so why spend extra money for something called “atmosphere?”  Well, needless to say, my thoughts have changed.  Not that I’m rich, but I’m no longer poor, and I know the value of atmosphere.  When you look at these two pictures, which view would you prefer?

I won’t give details and hope no one recognizes the two restaurants.  Recently I had to make a decision.  Either I remain at a place that met none of my expectations, based on my internet research and recommendations from friends, or I could go to another place that I knew would give a better vibe.  Sometimes we make choices and think that we are stuck in them.  You can always change your mind.  Even though I was dissatisfied with the atmosphere, not to mention the heat, and the fact that the complimentary items were already on the table, I did not just walk out.  I made a small purchase and left a fairly decent tip.  But my heart so welcomed my second choice.  I spent two hours looking out on the water and enjoyed every moment.  Now I know you can’t put a price on “atmosphere!”

We all have days and sometimes weeks when it seems like a huge animal called fear is chasing us around.  No matter how fast you run it keeps gaining on you.  As soon as you get up the nerve to tackle one thing another thing pops up.  You find yourself back on that treadmill with fear chasing you again.  You look at your goals that you wrote down and realize that you haven’t even come close to starting some of them, much less completing them.  And then there are things that you want to do simply because you have never done them before.  Either you keep telling yourself, or someone else keeps telling you, that it can’t be done.  In the back of your mind you still want to at least make an effort.  But, once again, that huge animal called fear is on your trail.

Recently I faced a fear that I have had for four years.  When I moved to Charleston, South Carolina the only time I would travel to Virginia was with family members.  I had always told myself that I am not able to drive that distance because of pain and discomfort from a surgery many years ago.  As my financial situation changed and I started to desire more control of my traveling situation, God changed the way I looked at that fear.  I started to see myself enjoying the ride rather than dreading it.  Needless to say, once I visualized it in my mind, I was able to do it.  So I finally traveled to Virginia to be with my children and grandchildren for a week.  I was able to do this because I looked fear in the face and said, “No, you will not sabotage my desire to see my children.  Yes, I can drive to Virginia and I will!”  I split the trip in half and spent a night in a hotel going and coming.  God took me safely all the way to Virginia and back to South Carolina.  I enjoyed the views along the way.  I took myself shopping and out to dinner.  It was nice to be in control of my time.  I was able to visit whomever I wanted to when it was convenient for me, rather than have someone take me to see people.  It was such a joy and a blessed trip that I am looking forward to doing it again next year.  When I arrived at my daughter’s house, I was so filled with the spirit that I almost danced a hole in her grass.  I praised the Lord so much that her neighbors started coming to their doors to see what was going on.  I told my daughter, “That’s okay.  They don’t know how far the Lord has brought me.  They will understand when they see the tags on my car.”  She said, “Mama you scaring my neighbors.  But that’s alright.  Do you!”

So in closing I say, “Do you!”  Don’t let fear keep you from trying something that you may be telling yourself that you cannot do.  With God all things are possible.